it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Panties = found
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
