My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
