Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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