He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
