Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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