Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
