Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize