Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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