She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
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