question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
We left an ass print on the piano.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I'm like, not good at living.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
