Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
