Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
