i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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