I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
