Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
