I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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