My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize
