My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
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