weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
