Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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