Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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