Me. At least after what I've been through.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
