I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize
