You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
do herpes really smell.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Randomize
