So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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