you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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