My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
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were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I'm both gender and math confused
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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