I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
We are all done wearing pants today
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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