In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
So. Much. Porn.
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