According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
