how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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