Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize