It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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