We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
