i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
