I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
