I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
