Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude