Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
All I want is dick and wine.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
