So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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