Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize