I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
he just fucked me for my cheese.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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