I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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