somebody snuck up and got me drunk
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize