Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize