I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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