it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Randomize
