I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.