My brain says no but my pants say off.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
