Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Randomize
