You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
