so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize