I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
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